On a whim and technically by the direction of another book I’ve been reading I’ve started reading a book called “The Pragmatics of Human Communication”. Its stuffy scholarly book written in the 1970’s that apparently hasn’t been updated since. Despite its obvious lack of information related to the way the internet has affected communication, and its frequent use of the term “cybernetics,” Pragmatics is unbelievably helpful. Though I haven’t finished it yet it has inspired me to talk about one of its recurring themes content and relationship.
The Recap
Messages can be divided into 2 parts: Content and Relationship. The Content is everything you’re actually saying. The Relationship is all the intangible stuff about a message, like your body language and tone of voice. For instance, if you were talking to your significant other, you could be annoyed because you’ve stayed up all night and you’re tired and say “Honey, let’s go to bed” or you could be interested in some intimacy and say “Honey, let’s go to bed”. The Content is the same, but the Relationship is different—upset or affectionate.
Messages can be divided into 2 parts: Content and Relationship. The Content is everything you’re actually saying. The Relationship is all the intangible stuff about a message, like your body language and tone of voice. For instance, if you were talking to your significant other, you could be annoyed because you’ve stayed up all night and you’re tired and say “Honey, let’s go to bed” or you could be interested in some intimacy and say “Honey, let’s go to bed”. The Content is the same, but the Relationship is different—upset or affectionate.
Healthy relationships focus more on Relationship than content and dysfunctional relationships focus more on Content. A healthy relationship example is when two people know each other so well that even with little to no Content they can communicate—like knowing the other person’s mood or their possible reaction to a given situation. An unhealthy relationship example would be the tumultuous partnerships full of arguing that never seems to solve anything. The partners aren’t hearing each other and are so focused on their own Content that nothing else gets across, not the other person’s Content or feelings.
Why does all this matter? Because we as consumers have healthy and unhealthy, relationships with brands and that effects their advertising.
Healthy Relationships
There are certain brands that always come to mind when making a purchase. Detergent = Tide. Soda = Coke. Chips = Lay’s. These brands have a big market share, and the biggest slice of brand awareness in our brains. Because we have been exposed to them so much, we have a healthy relationship with them. That healthy relationship means we no longer place a lot of focus on what their commercials say but how they say it—the feeling we get when we watch them. For example, the Coca-Cola Christmas commercials with the polar bears.
There are certain brands that always come to mind when making a purchase. Detergent = Tide. Soda = Coke. Chips = Lay’s. These brands have a big market share, and the biggest slice of brand awareness in our brains. Because we have been exposed to them so much, we have a healthy relationship with them. That healthy relationship means we no longer place a lot of focus on what their commercials say but how they say it—the feeling we get when we watch them. For example, the Coca-Cola Christmas commercials with the polar bears.
If we were focusing solely on Content we would be wondering why in the world bears were drinking sodas. But because our relationship with Coke has moved past that, we unconsciously focus on the feeling cute polar bears give us, namely, happiness.
Brands with a healthy consumer relationship can take risks in their advertising. They know that the consumers they are aiming for already “get it” and so the information about their product or service can be substituted for entertainment. Some of the funniest and most well received commercials are from the brands we know and love, and while there are a lot of contributing factors that make the previous statement true, none of it would be possible without a healthy relationship.
Unhealthy Relationships
We’ve all seen those commercials that just leave us wondering—what the point is, what their selling, who thought it was a good idea in the first place—and they just leave a bad taste in our mouths. Most of these commercials were made by “runner up” brands, names that occupy a smaller amount of space in our brains. These brands don’t have the same connection with us so we are often looking for more when we see a commercial. We want to be convinced of why we should pick their product over the brand we always buy, what gain we’ll get. Runner up brands normally miss the mark on this because they are not “hearing” us, they are too busy trying to compete with the big brands. An unhealthy relationship is marked by a focus on Content to the point where no actual communication is happening. They are not telling us anything with their commercials and they are not hearing what we need.
We’ve all seen those commercials that just leave us wondering—what the point is, what their selling, who thought it was a good idea in the first place—and they just leave a bad taste in our mouths. Most of these commercials were made by “runner up” brands, names that occupy a smaller amount of space in our brains. These brands don’t have the same connection with us so we are often looking for more when we see a commercial. We want to be convinced of why we should pick their product over the brand we always buy, what gain we’ll get. Runner up brands normally miss the mark on this because they are not “hearing” us, they are too busy trying to compete with the big brands. An unhealthy relationship is marked by a focus on Content to the point where no actual communication is happening. They are not telling us anything with their commercials and they are not hearing what we need.
A great recent example of this is the new Dairy Queen commercials that heavily draw on another big brand from another industry
Look familiar? DQ (Dairy Queen) is trying to draw on the spontaneity of the Old Spice commercials to engender a similar kind of healthy relationship. It won’t work and here’s why:
- Its been done. Old Spice has cornered the “random” market when it comes to commercials. Everyone else will look like a copy cat and it’s the originality of the idea that sells it.
- DQ is a runner up. While Dairy Queen has been a staple in the South for a long time, it’s still no Mc Donald’s and doesn’t have the same “share of mind” with consumers. Trying to skip the important part of relationship building and go straight for entertainment fails almost every time.
- Bad positioning. DQ isn’t hip or new, or anything really. It’s another fast food chain with one selling point—the Blizzard. Trying to be funny with “shaving bunnies” doesn’t remind people why they should come back to Dairy Queen—the Blizzard.
Most brands don’t understand why their commercials never “come though” and equal to increased sales. Again, there are a lot of contributing factors, but more often than not it’s because they don’t fully understand the kind of relationship they have with their audience.
To sum it all up, healthy relationships connect the brand and the consumer. Unhealthy relationships usually miss the mark. Now you may be thinking that with a little effort, every unhealthy relationship can be made healthy. Wrong. Just like people, brands—at their core—don’t usually change. A resistance to real transformative change will always equate to an unhealthy relationship. They can ply you with flowers, candy and special offers but without a bigger shift, they’ll never get the share or your mind and heart they need to get the share of your wallet they want.
